Thursday, October 4, 2018

GUILT and SHAME

GUILT
SHAME

These are choices. And you may describe them as feelings or as illusions, or whatever fits your perspective.

"Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free."
-Jim Morrison




Once the feeling of shame undertakes you, you begin to lose control of and sense of responsibility for yourself. Now, this experience can easily snowball into more of itself, which is why it is so dangerous. If we step into the present moment, we realize that it is we ourselves who create and perpetuate such feelings. IMO, we must get to the ROOT of it in order to free it, set it free, let ourselves heal, breathe, and relax into beingness.
No matter what you've done or your mind THINKS you've done, convincing you how "bad" you are and how you deserve to suffer for your wrongdoings-
I can assure you that (self) forgiveness is the first step to healing, not only yourself, but the entire universe. When we practice non judgement upon ourselves, we loosen the ties to suffering that we had somehow learned to depend upon. Nothing is necessarily wrong with suffering in and of itself, but if its something we claim we don't want, yet we continually experience, then perhaps its worth taking another approach towards our whole situation.
My idea of getting to the root of a problem is hardly of a selfish variety. Rather, we get to the root of the idea of sin in general and perhaps how it relates to our society's perpetuation of the righteous individual. Needless to say most all religious doctrines are practiced in complete hypocrisy,
there has been a great, deep, penetration of the idea of sin and morality into our minds and beings, which we then further adapt and apply to ourselves due to various factors within our own circles.
Wake up and recognize the patterns ! And catch yourself before you judge another again.

To be continued...

Feeling like I'm straying away from HD for now..  In flow

<3


Wednesday, October 3, 2018

Emotional AF Manifestor

This one goes out to all the manifestors out there who's (non-manifestor) parents try to control them and everything around them. That's probably all of us huh?
First of all, when we're not living by our designs, and trying to force things, it gets out of wack as most of us know from experience.
But when we're under attack from outside forces who are unawares of their own design, things get really out of hand. Perhaps it is my vulnerabilities that are being brought up for my own benefit-
My feelings of shame and guilt for the way that I live my life,
why else would I give any validation to the absurdities that are being sprouted at me?
I do my best to stray away from blaming others as I ultimately believe that we are each responsible for our own realities.
This being said, however, there are some people who live within negative and destructive cycles within their own realities, who, when given the chance, will bring others into that same reality as well.
I am doing my best to express myself free of judgement.
If we go further and take into account defined and undefined centers, we can see more clearly the negative energetic manipulation that can occur, even unknowingly.
I no longer wish to take upon myself the shame and the guilt and the anger of others. I truly wish to release myself of feelings of guilt and shame

What is the best thing these feelings have offered me? What is the greatest thing about feeling shame? This gives us the illusion of a moral compass perhaps, it makes us feel like there is right and wrong, and that we are accountable for our actions. Shame, however, no longer serves me, as it is a destructive and limiting interpretation of reality. Whence I am able to see my decisions and thoughts, experiences and emotions from a neutral perspective , through using great understanding and non judgement, the feeling of shame is rendered irrelevant. The same goes for guilt and for regret, and we hold onto these feelings as if "one day" we will do something righteous enough to alter them,
but this is all a trick of the mind
a lesson
we have created this. I have created this, asked for this, perpetuated this, and am currently writing this. I want to set myself free and move onto the next thing. I am ready to learn to live in abundance, freedom and acceptance. The next step I see for myself is a life lived completely in the present moment, without expectation nor judgement. I need far less than I think I need.

The purpose of this trip
of any thing
face your fears and vulnerabilities. own your choices. OWN YOUR CHOICES. start now. even to uncover the past and release any potential remnants of these feelings that we deem no longer serve us,
begin now,
as time is illusory.
own your choice.
to create your reality
in each moment
with your thoughts
and feelings
and environment
and body and mind and heart
FORGIVENESS
is the key
to unlocking a wisdom
that could never be read. researched. its only FOUND within


on taking responsibility for "the other"
as the self . I am responsible for this body, this heart, this mind, this soul , this energy. This energy is a fractal of all others as all others are a fractal of it.
we can recognize infinity , under any circumstance, but it is not up to ME to heal someone else. no matter what, unless there is a specific agreement for a certain interaction to occur.
if someones energy is pissing you off, DO SOMETHING about it,
or do nothing haha
your choice
you never really DO anything anyway. what is a decision, what is an action, what is a sensation .?.







Saturday, September 22, 2018

Riding the Waves as an Emotional Manifestor

Hi all! Welcome to my Human Design - centric blog reality.  I am a 2/4 Single Definition Emotional Manifestor and I am here to share information with you about my journey. I first discovered HD about 4 years ago, I'm currently 24, but only within the last couple of years have I begun to more seriously apply my strategy and authority. I am going to discuss my experience with having my solar plexus defined, and therefore, emotional authority. This post might bring some clarity to you even if you are not a manifestor, but still have emotional authority.
Where to begin?! Patience has been my greatest friend on my journey. When I am angry or upset, generally my mind attempts to decide what I will do, which often involves rejecting/running away/aggressively taking action regarding some situation. On the flip side, when I agree to things out of impulsive excitement, I tend to involve myself in situations that I regret in the long run. They say within Human Design that those with an emotional authority should play hard to get! When presented with an impulse (or an offer, etc, depending on your strategy) it is actually detrimental to respond out of impulsivity! Actually, the options become better for you when you wait them out, as the desire for your investment builds in the other. What a novel idea. You may have studied manifestation, you may have listened to Bashar (who, by the way, I appreciate fully) but I just want to clarify the idea of excitement in the body and how it relates (at least to me) as an emotional authority being.
The idea here is that we must wait for the body to feel at peace. When the excitement is felt as a nervousness within the body, this is a direct indicator that the time has not yet come to make a decision. I think that when Bashar professes to follow your highest excitement, I think that for an emotional being this is an excitement that resonates on the soul level, something that feels "right" as opposed to something that the body is nervously excited about.
I hope this makes sense to you, I encourage you to message me if you'd like to discuss this further.
An example of balance in emotional-authority decision making: My mother and I have been planning a trip to the mountains. We recently got in a bit of a quarrel and lots of anger and frustration was released. During this (downward) emotional wave, I thought for SURE I don't want to go to the mountains with this woman. I was convinced there was no way this would make sense for me. Rather than go and tell her this, and create more polarity in my reality, I acknowledged my downward emotional spiral and I thought to myself, let me wait this one out. Less than 24 hours later, I am at peace with my body and in my emotions. From this clear emotional space I can see that I would very much like to go on this trip with her, as I can see all the potentially wonderful experiences arising from this opportunity.
I encourage you to dig deeper into yourself. Get to know yourself. Understand your emotional waves! We can strive towards removing our bias towards the wave in either direction. When we realize it for what is is, emotions as catalysts for inspiration, change, introspection, and ultimately deep EXPERIENCE of life; when we can appreciate emotions for their ability to connect us to the human experience on such an intimate level, then we can learn how to let them work with us instead of conceptualizing them as challenging and something that must be overcome.
Learn your emotional waves. Learn to recognize when you are feeling nervousness in the body.. Learn to realize that the downward waves are temporary, what goes up must come down. Recognize how the decisions made form a place of instability affect your life more drastically than simply waiting out your emotions. Learn to confidently express that you need time to see how you FEEL about a given situation after you sleep on it. Appreciate your process and others will appreciate it too.
And in the meantime, enjoy the ride!!!
Mahalo for taking this journey with me.